one problem at a time--ok, at the most, two

I had a weekend of super fun highs and the most awful lows, neither of which I feel like writing about.  This morning, I started the day with a bunch of heart-hard, cantankerous children (who were great all weekend, but two of whom were also really sick, now recovered).  I was trying to get one child to start her morning routine in the bedroom (some days asking them to do it at the same time is just asking too much), trying to get another child to start her school independently in the living room, trying to feed myself and Smiley while helping the last child with her school, and no one was cooperating nicely and there was a lot of rebellion--and I am myself in a super sad heart place today, and had already prayed before getting out of bed, "Lord, please help me!"  Standing there in the bedroom, with a defiant child in front of me, I knew I had 4 problems before me:
1) getting to our bi-weekly morning martial arts class on time
2) getting children through their routines, fed, and started on their day quickly and efficiently
3) getting schoolwork done for the day
4) getting our hearts back into good places, esp. being loving and gentle with one another

And I really feel like God honored my plea for help, by giving me wisdom.  Because standing in front of a defiant child first thing in the morning when we have to be somewhere soon and I am not in a good heart-place myself does not usually lead to my better mommying moments.  But this morning I was completely able to stay calm, and think through the situation quickly and with what sure seemed like wisdom, and realize that I could only successfully handle at most two of those problems--there was no way I was going to gracefully be able to solve all four.  I chose the two that were the most important to focus on, to succeed in:
1) getting schoolwork done for the day
2) getting our hearts back into good places, esp. being loving and gentle with one another

And so, with that realization and choice, I could move forward with calm surety.  Without a looming deadline to meet, I could let each child take as much time as she needed in the bedroom alone doing her routine.  And they needed it--two of my girls gave me a lot of trouble, and rebelled and pushed buttons, and got consequences, but the time allowed them to work through it, and allowed me to be patient and gentle and firm.  And now they are still both having a slightly rough day, but they are also recovering fairly well, and we have not all escalated down into a horrible day.

And so, while the day is not over yet,
1) they are right on track with getting their schoolwork done for the day (and are doing it with pretty good attitudes too)
2) they are overall working those hearts back into good shape, and have had some really good moments of love and gentleness with one another.

And I am still calm, still being firm but gentle, and still while still completely forlorn, am also striving forward with hope.

Of course, it's only 2:52, my negative side says.  Still PLENTY of time for things to spiral back down.

And we DID miss martial arts, which is a waste of opportunity and against my principles. Normally I would have rushed us all, to make it to class, yelling and scolding the entire time.  But is martial arts really the most important thing we could accomplish this morning?

Since I knew I was not able to achieve all those goals at once, fix all those problems in the same morning, I chose to focus on what was really important to me today, and what seems to be the most important in the Grand Scheme of Things.  It might look different another day--but today is what I have, and so today I chose to let go of my ideals and focus on accomplishing less, but succeeding more. 

Not a bad morning's work.

Lord, please keep up your good work in me--still approximately  4.5 hours left to go!